Catechism Corner: who is forming the hearts of our children?

By Marco Roman, Ph.D.

Director of Communications

“Let the children come to me, and do not prevent them; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these” (Mt 19:14).

“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believes in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea” (Mt 18:6).

There are few things more beautiful than the face of a young child. Their innocence, trust, joy and simplicity remind us of the goodness of God’s creation and the hope He places before the world. Every child is created in the image and likeness of God (CCC 1700), possessing an inestimable dignity that no one can ever diminish.

Parents are the first educators of their children

Each is entrusted to parents, families and the entire Christian community to be loved, protected and given the truth about humanity’s true vocation in Jesus Christ, together with the commandments and virtues that preserve innocence, form conscience and lead young people toward authentic freedom, holiness and lasting happiness.

The Catechism teaches that parents are the first educators of their children in faith and virtue (CCC 2221–2231), a sacred responsibility that no culture, institution or technology can ever replace.

Parents are called to create a home “where tenderness, forgiveness, respect, fidelity and disinterested service are the rule” (CCC 2223). The Christian home is therefore not merely a refuge from what is harmful. It is meant to be a school of love and virtue, where children first encounter the goodness of God and learn what it means to live as His sons and daughters.

Whenever I see young children at Sunday Mass or encounter them in everyday life, I often find my eyes filling with tears. They are not tears of sentimentality. They are tears born from a profound concern for what so many children are already encountering in the world around them.

I cannot help but wonder what images they have already seen, what messages they have absorbed, and what lies about love, marriage, sexuality and human dignity are already competing for their hearts and minds before they are even old enough to understand them.

The greatest tragedy

It is difficult to overstate the seriousness of the cultural moment in which we live. Never before have children possessed such immediate access to entertainment, social media, music, movies, video platforms and digital devices capable of shaping their moral imagination.

Much of what was once recognized as shameful, immoral or scandalous has become commonplace. Sexual immorality is often promoted as a positive good. Confusion regarding marriage, sexuality and personal identity is presented as enlightened progress. Vulgarity has become entertainment, profanity ordinary conversation and ridicule and humiliation common forms of public discourse.

The greatest tragedy is that children encounter these messages long before they possess the maturity to recognize them for what they are. Their imaginations, consciences and understanding of authentic love can be formed by voices that neither know nor love the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Repeated images and messages can become deeply impressed upon the imagination, sharing attitudes, desires and expectations for years. The Catechism reminds us that conscience must be carefully formed and enlightened by truth (CCC 1783–1785). Yet countless young people are growing up amid cultural messages that contradict God’s plan for the human person.

And what is formed in childhood does not simply disappear when childhood ends.

Christian marriage presents a radically different vision

The understanding of love, sexuality, fidelity and human dignity that children receive during their formative years can become part of the foundation upon which they later approach the vocation of marriage and family life.

If children repeatedly learn that love is primarily about personal satisfaction, that sexual intimacy can be separated from lifelong commitment, that promises are conditional upon feelings and that fertility is something to be feared or rejected, we should not be surprised when many enter adulthood without a clear understanding of the beautiful vocation to which so many of them will one day be called.

Christian marriage presents a radically different vision. It calls a man and woman to a love that is faithful, forever and fruitful—a covenant of total self-gift reflecting Christ’s faithful love for His Church. Children deserve to be formed for that possibility long before they stand before the altar.

When the culture instead forms them according to counterfeit understandings of love, freedom and sexuality, the consequences can eventually appear in weakened commitments, infidelity, broken families and divorce. These tragedies have many causes and involve complex personal circumstances, but we cannot ignore the deeper cultural formation that increasingly teaches young people precisely the opposite of permanence, fidelity, sacrifice and openness to life.

If we desire stronger marriages tomorrow, we must take seriously the formation of children’s hearts today.

The Catechism offers a profoundly beautiful alternative: “Teaching modesty to children and adolescents means awakening in them respect for the human person” (CCC 2524).

The goal is not merely to shield children from harmful images or immoral influences, important as that is; it is to awaken within them a profound reverence for themselves and for every other person as someone created in the image and likeness of God.

Modesty protects the mystery and dignity of the person and prepares young people to live chastity, purity, self-mastery and genuine charity. These are not merely rules for adolescence. They are virtues that prepare a person to make an authentic gift of self in whatever vocation God eventually gives.

 Love protects the innocent

Jesus spoke with unmistakable clarity about the seriousness of protecting children: “Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin …” (Mt 18:6). The Catechism likewise teaches that scandal is an attitude or behavior that leads another to do evil (CCC 2284) and becomes especially grave when directed toward those who are weak, vulnerable or entrusted to our care (CCC 2285).

When entire industries profit from exposing children to moral confusion and entertainment repeatedly glamorizes vice while ridiculing virtue, we must ask whether we have begun to accept what should instead break our hearts. Love demands more from us. Love protects the innocent.

The Church cannot remain silent. Parents deserve every possible support in protecting and forming their children. Young people deserve to hear the beauty of God’s plan for love, marriage and human sexuality before the culture offers its counterfeits. Bishops, priests, deacons, catechists, Catholic educators and the entire faithful share responsibility for proclaiming that truth with courage and compassion.

Society also bears responsibility. We should advocate for laws that protect minors from exploitation, sexualization and grave harm while encouraging technology companies, social media platforms, entertainment industries and public institutions to establish meaningful safeguards that place the welfare of children above profit.

Protecting children from exploitation and gravely harmful content is not an attack upon authentic freedom. It is an act of justice rooted in the God-given dignity of every human person.

Our response

Our response, however, cannot simply be criticism of the culture. The answer is, and always has been, Jesus Christ.

Only Christ fully reveals the dignity of the human person because He reveals both who God is and who we are created to become. His Gospel is not a collection of arbitrary restrictions but the path to authentic freedom, lasting joy and genuine human flourishing. “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (Jn 8:32).

For this reason, the Ten Commandments remain not relics of an earlier age but God’s enduring covenant of love (CCC 2057–2063). They protect life, safeguard marriage, defend chastity, preserve honesty and protect the reputation of others.

The virtues that flow from God’s commandments are not restrictions upon human freedom but the path toward authentic happiness, interior peace and holiness. Our children need more than protection from what is false; they need to be formed in what is true, good and beautiful.

If we truly desire to protect the innocence of children, our homes, pulpits, Catholic schools, parish religious education programs and every ministry of the Church must confidently teach the fullness of the Catholic faith and the beauty of God’s moral law.

Parents must be strengthened in their irreplaceable vocation as the first educators of their children. Defending childhood innocence is not merely one pastoral concern among many. It is a profound act of evangelization, an urgent work of mercy and an essential expression of Christian charity.

Who will form their hearts?

The question before us is not whether our children will be formed. They will be formed.

The question is: Who will form their hearts, according to what vision of the human person, and toward what ultimate destiny?

The tears that come to my eyes when I see young children are ultimately tears of hope. Every child remains infinitely precious in the sight of God, and no darkness is greater than the light of Christ.

They are also tears we should never stop shedding, because the day we cease to be troubled by what threatens the innocence and dignity of children is the day we risk becoming indifferent to something Christ Himself regarded as precious.

Every child deserves to encounter first not the counterfeits of a fallen culture but the face of Jesus Christ. If we truly love our children, we will give them not merely our affection, education and protection, but the greatest gift we possess: Jesus Christ, who is “the way and the truth and the life” (Jn 14:6).

Only in Him can they discover who they truly are, the dignity with which they were created, and the joy, holiness and eternal destiny for which every human heart was made.